Wed Dec 07, 2005 3:58 pm
Gentlemen, a minute of your time please!
I regret that it is my duty to inform each and every one of you as to the particulars of the terrible plot which we have of late uncovered. An Esquilaxativian hoperative, Mr Tors Denneti, was aprehended on the boarders of Tawakalnastan. As there are certain silly rules and convention thingies there it was considered diligent to transport Mr Denneti on an unmarked plane to to Craggy Oiland off the coast of Swissdrulandia, a location where a fair and thorough investigation free from the constraints of silly rules could be effected.
It became apparent that Tors Denneti was infact sent to Swissdruland in order to kid-nap the Nobel Prize winning Dr. U. Id. The doctor had been briefed by our intelligence division regarding a form of biological weaponary known as Chimaeroid. Tors aim was to discover whether or not the doctor had discovered a cure for the debilitating effects of Chimaeroids before Esquilaxativia deployed the "Space Hopper" weapon which carries it.
Exhibit A: The Space Hopper Prototype---
These simple devices were to be filled with Chimaeroids and issued to toy stores around the world in an aim to attack the most innocent, weakest and cherished of all our people, our children.
Exhibit B: Esquilaxativian Artists Impression of Mission Code Name "Space Hopper"
Stage 1:
Stage 2:
Before long it would even infect our live stock,
Further evidence captured by our hiht-tech spy planes, some of which shall be allocated to the Aranian Air Corps as per their request, subject to terms and conditions of course, can prove that the evil Dig-taitor used animal testing prior to the weapons' completion.
Exhibit C: Animal Testing
Finally these weapons would be mass produced and shipped into the stores by Christmas.
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After the weapon destroyed our live stock and killed our children, the Esquilaxativians with their rapid reproductive rates would quickly over run our land all the time impervious to the devistating effects of Chimaeroids as their Laxative gene-ancestry posesses a strong natural immunity.
We did not release this information earlier as it would clearly have caused a global panic. Also, we had to fabricate all of the...no...my bad...corroborate all of the evidence prior to making such bold accusations. It is only on receiving the Grand Mulla's coded message
I thank you for your time, gravely apologise to anybody on diall-up. I trust that you will treat this with the maturity and gravity which it deserves.
Edited by - druid on 12/7/2005 4:08:24 PM
Edited by - druid on 12/7/2005 4:10:13 PM
Edited by - druid on 12/7/2005 4:12:13 PM
I regret that it is my duty to inform each and every one of you as to the particulars of the terrible plot which we have of late uncovered. An Esquilaxativian hoperative, Mr Tors Denneti, was aprehended on the boarders of Tawakalnastan. As there are certain silly rules and convention thingies there it was considered diligent to transport Mr Denneti on an unmarked plane to to Craggy Oiland off the coast of Swissdrulandia, a location where a fair and thorough investigation free from the constraints of silly rules could be effected.
It became apparent that Tors Denneti was infact sent to Swissdruland in order to kid-nap the Nobel Prize winning Dr. U. Id. The doctor had been briefed by our intelligence division regarding a form of biological weaponary known as Chimaeroid. Tors aim was to discover whether or not the doctor had discovered a cure for the debilitating effects of Chimaeroids before Esquilaxativia deployed the "Space Hopper" weapon which carries it.
Exhibit A: The Space Hopper Prototype---
These simple devices were to be filled with Chimaeroids and issued to toy stores around the world in an aim to attack the most innocent, weakest and cherished of all our people, our children.
Exhibit B: Esquilaxativian Artists Impression of Mission Code Name "Space Hopper"
Stage 1:
Stage 2:
Before long it would even infect our live stock,
Further evidence captured by our hiht-tech spy planes, some of which shall be allocated to the Aranian Air Corps as per their request, subject to terms and conditions of course, can prove that the evil Dig-taitor used animal testing prior to the weapons' completion.
Exhibit C: Animal Testing
Finally these weapons would be mass produced and shipped into the stores by Christmas.
-------------------------------------------
After the weapon destroyed our live stock and killed our children, the Esquilaxativians with their rapid reproductive rates would quickly over run our land all the time impervious to the devistating effects of Chimaeroids as their Laxative gene-ancestry posesses a strong natural immunity.
We did not release this information earlier as it would clearly have caused a global panic. Also, we had to fabricate all of the...no...my bad...corroborate all of the evidence prior to making such bold accusations. It is only on receiving the Grand Mulla's coded message
that I knew our troops were fully prepared to combat this latest Weapon of Ass Destruction, Chimaeroids with our counter ofensive Operation Mixupmetosees .
cramped hole
I thank you for your time, gravely apologise to anybody on diall-up. I trust that you will treat this with the maturity and gravity which it deserves.
Edited by - druid on 12/7/2005 4:08:24 PM
Edited by - druid on 12/7/2005 4:10:13 PM
Edited by - druid on 12/7/2005 4:12:13 PM
.
Any chance we might use your air bases for refuelling our totally non-military jack-boot and fatigue wearing, completely legitimate rabbitarian aid workers type-people-transports? Those guns you see them carry are actually tranqualiser rifles for helping sedate panicked and injured bunnies who have attempted to escape the Esquilaxativian Guard.
