**Tawakalni Resistance Report**

Once again the heroes of the Tawakalni Resistance have struck at the heart of the illegal Esquilaxitive occupation of our homeland. In a daring raid, mujahid forces loyal to the Grand Mullah have destroyed ginger-beer pipelines storage facilties, preventing the foul brew from being distributed amongst the population and from resupplying the addicted rabbits cowering in their burrows. Simultaneously, myxamitosis moratr attacks on the so-called Green Zone, a heavily fortified warren on the site of the former Grand Pala.. erm Mosque, sent the cowardly rabbits and collaborationists scurrying for cover.

As part of their summary justice against traitors to the cause, loyal fedayeen kidnapped the ERF who is to be tried by a People's Sharia Court for his treasonous collaboration with the kufr rabbit occupiers. I imagine he will no doubt come to a grisly but well-deserved end.

Meanwhile, Equilurxian propaganda continues to pretend that everything is fine and the sun shines happiness is everywhere, blatantly ignoring the fact that their occupation has turned into a hell of their own making and that the people of Tawakalnistan will never accept rule by rabbits, and that the Resistance won't rest until every last rabbit is gone from our land, except for the one's in the butchers shops or on our plates.

Ah yes, here we see the Tawakalnic propaganda machine at work. Let's look at the facts shall we? The ex-Mullah has been hiding at a tropical resort far away from Esquilaxistan for months, and has spent all of his money on expensive food and large, indoor sandpits. He has had no contact with Esquilaxistan since that time, and the people are clearly happy to have been freed. Why would they follow him? After all, you all saw the scenes that greeted his defeat:



And what of the weapons that Taw allegedly has? Explosives? Mortar attacks? Pathogens? Bah! How can afford any of that? He only own one $10 Lada, and it is still in his possession according to Esquilaxitavian rabbit operatives. In addition, Esquilaxistan is still under the control of Mustang, who would not be incompetent enough allow such attacks to go forward, even if Taw had the aforementioned resources which, as shown above, he does not.

As for ERF, the mysterious personage *has* been very silent of late, and despite initial overtures of support, he/she/it has not proven to be terribly helpful during the rebuilding of Esquilaxistan. It's a shame about his/her/its capture, but I will speak to Musty about erecting a plaque somewhere in Esquilaxistan for ERF. Oh, and I'll send some ENIS operatives out to look for him/her/it. but we have no idea who to look for...

As for Esquilaxistan, it is still nice and peaceful, don't believe the Mullah's lies! I don't know this for a fact as I have never visited Esquilaxistan personally, but the reports are glowing I assure you.

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the control of Mustang, who would not be incompetent enough

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there's one too many "in" contained within that quote. I suggest that the statement would be more accurate by it's omission. And since when has Mustang been sober enough to even know if anything was going on?

it's funny isn't it how you've conveniently never been since your "conquest" or illegal and opportunistic invasion to give it it's proper title. I seem to recall the traitor ERF begging you to show yourself, you refused, things have gone to rack and ruin and the ERF is nowhere to be seen (well except as a kind of bloody pinyate hanging from the lamposts) Scared to show yourself in Tawakalnistan?

that statue was coming down anyway, i never liked it. it was a holdover from the former Socialist Realist school, and we don' do that no-more. You just saved me the demolition cost (which means more Cuban cigars and honeyed sherbert here on indycorp's private island erm i mean more money for the valiant resistance forces, yes!)

I'd love to stop and exchange propaganda with you, but tonight's show starts in the Tropicana Ballroom in ten minutes and Indycorp have spared no expense this time, Tony Bennet's top billing erm i mean important diplomatic meetings arranged by indycorp to secure the liberation of our beloved homeland, yes! with Al-Taniyah Bahnatti in the chair.

I don't have the time to fly over to Esquilaxistan; I have things to do. Esquilaxitavia doesn't run itself you know. I may be taking a trip to NZ at some stage however, which should be nice (like the South of France, ha ha). The Rabbit-King does not like travelling, but NZ is supposed to be nice, and I may move there to get away from Aus or, as I like to think of it, "America Junior". Why? Because parliament seems to be full of religious fundamentalists these days *sigh*. True, the government has always had that element, but they are more obvious these days, and are trying the US trick of catering to the evangelical crowd. It's quite scary actually. Still, I can say no more. Politics + TLR = Bad.

As for your "show"... I see that the resort staff are really bringing in the "big guns". Who will be next? Ray Jay Johnson? Elvis impersonators? Maybe they are trying to get rid of you. I would, if you were sitting around stinkin' up one of MY rooms!

*sneeks in to take a peek*

No stirring required here, I see things are bubbling along adequately without my help.

*hops....erm...skulks back into the shadows*

This just in from the Esquilax' Press Secretary, Johnny Rain:

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Dank House
December 19, 2006:

His Royal Netherness, Esquilax, no longer will comment upon whether we are winning the war in Esquilaxistan. Questions asked by the press corps on this issue will not be taken nor will they be answered.

What do you mean? The war has been won! Esquilaxistan is now controlled by the Rabbit-King and his loyal vassal Mustang, while Taw is still cowering under his hotel bed in fear!

"Tors" - That's alright, stir away. "Wow" me with your wit .

Clarification on previous announcement by Press Secretary Johnny Rain

Dank House
December 19, 2006:

His Royal Netherness will not comment on the status of the War because it has been won. What now transpires is not a war but a gradual disengagement in Esquilaxistan.

This disengagement should not be confused with a withdrawal nor should it be equated with a response to minor incidents recurring among the locals.

Questions concerning the status of such recurring incidents and the Esquilaxitavian military's response thereto will not be taken nor answered.

Edited by - Indy11 on 12/19/2006 7:15:40 PM

>>>>>>>> The Esquilaxitive

Dank House Press Secretary Johnny Rain announced today that his Royal Netherness extends to all and sundry seasonal greetings.

The Nethernal seasonal message:

"We are somewhat amused."

This thread has got to be the biggest thread on any forum in existance.

curses, my cunning plan to have retaken Tawakalnistan by Christams has failed, due to the many distractions on offer on Indycorp's private "Christmas Island" themed 5-star luxury resort complex. Still, there's plenty of ex-Soviet armaments and equipment in the Swiss Dru Enterprises New Year All Year Mega Bonanza Super Sale, so no doubt I'll be snapping up some bargains for the forthcoming "offensive" against the declining Empire of the Rabbits.

1200, totally unbeliveable.

*Shakes head*

this thing is STILL going? O_o


Before ANYBODY asks....
I had my username BEFORE the game even existed. Thank you.

1,200 posts? Really? *Tents paws* Excellent! In any case, there are far bigger threads than this around, but few are as amusing .

As for Taw's "cunning plan", once again we see his lack of funds. Why else would he need ta buy weepons after Christmas?