To: www.evilwarlordsupplies.com
From: chief interrogator of Factorovia, Realm of the Celestial Glory Fear Factor IV
Subject: more truth serum
More enemy spies captured, we ran out of chemical interrogation supplies. Please send more. The usual amount. We had to delegate the interrogation to Mustantopia.
Lord Mustang is wise and just. They will be spared the humiliation of a trial.
END MEMO
PS you would not happen to have end-of-year discount, would you?
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Utopias
This is where you can discuss your homework, family, just about anything, make strange sounds and otherwise discuss things which are really not related to the Lancer-series. Yes that means you can discuss other games.
Wed Dec 31, 2003 2:35 pm
We will sit at their discussion table. We will agree to the cease-fire. We will sign the Non-Aggression Treaty. We will tolerate the presence of their troops on our borders. We will allow the breakaway and splinter factions to have their "independent" territories. We will build Morrisons' for them. We will do all these things in a spirit of fraternity and co-operation, and we will do it seemingly wholeheartedly.
Rest assured that your Dear Leader is solely concerned with maintaining the integrity of the Revolution and this is far from capitulation. We have proven ourselves on the field of arms and our diplomacy is sure and just. The time has come to consolidate the achievements of the Revolution and await the ultimate victory with patience and forebearance. Our heroic military under the inspired leadership of Marshal D. dB. Locutov and General Orillion will maintain the defence of our borders, the integrity of the Revolution and the loyalty of the People will continue to be maintained by the loyal and capable Commissar E.Indinsky, and the new weapons from the Esquilaxiov Design Bureau will ensure that we remain at the forefront of technology. Medals and Orders of the Tawakalnic Union all around.
Your Leader has other means of making the enemies of the Motherland suffer
(internal questions to Minister of State Security: should we let Esquilax's family go now the immediate crisis is over? And bring in Comrade Gromitov for questioning over apparently abandoning us in our hour of need.)
Edited by - Tawakalna on 31-12-2003 15:59:18
Rest assured that your Dear Leader is solely concerned with maintaining the integrity of the Revolution and this is far from capitulation. We have proven ourselves on the field of arms and our diplomacy is sure and just. The time has come to consolidate the achievements of the Revolution and await the ultimate victory with patience and forebearance. Our heroic military under the inspired leadership of Marshal D. dB. Locutov and General Orillion will maintain the defence of our borders, the integrity of the Revolution and the loyalty of the People will continue to be maintained by the loyal and capable Commissar E.Indinsky, and the new weapons from the Esquilaxiov Design Bureau will ensure that we remain at the forefront of technology. Medals and Orders of the Tawakalnic Union all around.
Your Leader has other means of making the enemies of the Motherland suffer
(internal questions to Minister of State Security: should we let Esquilax's family go now the immediate crisis is over? And bring in Comrade Gromitov for questioning over apparently abandoning us in our hour of need.)
Edited by - Tawakalna on 31-12-2003 15:59:18
Wed Dec 31, 2003 3:25 pm
*Video footage of long columns of Pink Army armored and mechanized units festooned with garlands progressing back to PDRNS territory*
.....
*A platoon of light infantry march past the camera crew while singing*
It's a long way from Mustantopia
It's a long way to go
It's a long way from Mustantopia
To the Taw Way I call home .....
Fade to black with the sound of whistling and marching growing mute
.....
*A platoon of light infantry march past the camera crew while singing*
It's a long way from Mustantopia
It's a long way to go
It's a long way from Mustantopia
To the Taw Way I call home .....
Fade to black with the sound of whistling and marching growing mute
Wed Dec 31, 2003 3:31 pm
@Mustang: Your Imperial Highness, I'd tend to agree to a peace negotiation, 'cuz it always includes drinking 
. After that we can always find some way to crush our enemies unexpectedly once and for all.
Yours truly,
Minister of Smoking and Drinking Affairs
"Beer is proof that god loves us and wants us to be happy"
. After that we can always find some way to crush our enemies unexpectedly once and for all.
Yours truly,
Minister of Smoking and Drinking Affairs
"Beer is proof that god loves us and wants us to be happy"
Wed Dec 31, 2003 3:48 pm
Ministry of Parties letter 00000001 to PDRNS, mustantopia and fractovia.
We propose a party at DUSK retreat in the epping forest, there will be plenty of serving wenches and free beer, bring a friend!
It is better to aim for the stars and hit the tops of the trees than to aim for nothing and hit it dead on.
We propose a party at DUSK retreat in the epping forest, there will be plenty of serving wenches and free beer, bring a friend!
It is better to aim for the stars and hit the tops of the trees than to aim for nothing and hit it dead on.
Wed Dec 31, 2003 6:19 pm
Great Leader Tawakalna, my staff have elected to take time off for the New Year's festivities; recommend immediate cessation of cigarette and vodka rations for all staff.
Awating further instructions.
Esquilax.
Head of Ministry of Science, Technology & Weapons Development.
Off-topic note: It's about time to sticky this thread, don't you think?
Awating further instructions.
Esquilax.
Head of Ministry of Science, Technology & Weapons Development.
Off-topic note: It's about time to sticky this thread, don't you think?
Wed Dec 31, 2003 6:46 pm
Emperor Mustang is feeling very hungover but has drawn all his strength to accept this invitation and join the parties taking part in the DUSK peace summit at the secret mountain retreat. However Emperor Mustang must insist that four of his Imperial Bodyguard join him in order to protect his person. You can be assured that they will be quite inconspicuos throughout the summit but you should be warned that they only abide to be touched by the Emperor himself.
The troops are trained in 5 forms of hand to hand combat and have advanced weapons and tactical conditioning. They were involved in many of the underground missions during the great Utopian War.
Please see attached photo for a more descriptive view.
The troops are trained in 5 forms of hand to hand combat and have advanced weapons and tactical conditioning. They were involved in many of the underground missions during the great Utopian War.
Please see attached photo for a more descriptive view.
Thu Jan 01, 2004 1:36 am
Commencing encryption: PGP 6.5.8
............................................Encryption Process Complete.
-----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE-----
Version: 6.5.8
To: Great Leader Tawakalna
From: Ministry of Science, Technology & Weapons Development
Subject: Top Secret
Great and Benevolent Leader; further to our discussion regarding field tests of our new organic explosive designated "Project Xi", the amount of time required for critical mass has been increased, and the explosive radius has been doubled as per your request.
Recommendation: Testing of "Project Xi" to be conducted during proposed peace conference.
Esquilax.
Head of Ministry of Science, Technology & Weapons Development.
-----END PGP SIGNATURE-----
............................................Encryption Process Complete.
-----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE-----
Version: 6.5.8
To: Great Leader Tawakalna
From: Ministry of Science, Technology & Weapons Development
Subject: Top Secret
Great and Benevolent Leader; further to our discussion regarding field tests of our new organic explosive designated "Project Xi", the amount of time required for critical mass has been increased, and the explosive radius has been doubled as per your request.
Recommendation: Testing of "Project Xi" to be conducted during proposed peace conference.
Esquilax.
Head of Ministry of Science, Technology & Weapons Development.
-----END PGP SIGNATURE-----
Thu Jan 01, 2004 1:59 am
ministry of parties letter to Mustantopia, PDRNS and Fractovia:
* The mountain retreat is very secure, however if you wish to bring your own body guards that is fine.
** Representatives of other DUSK ministries will be there should you wish to speak to them
*** We will be scanning all vehicles and personnel for explosives, this is for everyones safety.
****The ministry of science and technology will be showcasing new explosive scanners, designed to detect organic explosives, something DUSK has extensive knowledge of.
* The mountain retreat is very secure, however if you wish to bring your own body guards that is fine.
** Representatives of other DUSK ministries will be there should you wish to speak to them
*** We will be scanning all vehicles and personnel for explosives, this is for everyones safety.
****The ministry of science and technology will be showcasing new explosive scanners, designed to detect organic explosives, something DUSK has extensive knowledge of.
Thu Jan 01, 2004 10:20 am
I greet all Comrades in a spirit of socialist fraternity at this New Year time of festivity.
Your struggle and victory over our foes in the Great Patriotic War of Utopia will never be forgotten by the Party, which embodies the will of you, the People. We now have peace, but remain ever vigilant against our treacherous foes. Even now our brave State Security Commission is rooting out the disaffected traitors and troublemakers who would disturb the Peace of our Worker's Paradise!
Already we see that our enemy has not changed his nature, despite having been forced to the negotiating table, by our glorious feats of arms under the inspired leadership of Marshal Locutov and the heroism of General Orilliosk and the other officers. Again the false accusations spew forth, coupled with the unceasing propaganda aimed at corrupting our Socialist vision and inciting the People towards decadence.
Witness one of our Tawakalnian women respond the blatant degeneracy and licentiousness of Mustantopia..
Remember the purity of our cause! Denounce the traitors amongst you! be on your guard against Mustantopian and Factorovian agents! Defend the Revolution! protect the munificence of Comrade Taw and the Morrison's fresh grocery section! Remember that thanks to Tawakalna, when you buy a half a cucumber you only pay for half a cucumber!
As I am unable to attend the Armistice talks in person, for my duty is to remain in the Motherland as an inspiration to our People, the loyal Comrade Indinsky will once again shoulder the burden, along with the Generals of the Armies who will ensure security and co-operation for the occasion...
(Esquilaxiov, are those long-range stealth missiles ready yet? i trust they will carry the new organic warheads of Fartov @ssripper V? just a precaution. range the missiles onto, oh, say, the Ashford area - no particular reason)
Edited by - Tawakalna on 1/1/2004 10:21:22 AM
Your struggle and victory over our foes in the Great Patriotic War of Utopia will never be forgotten by the Party, which embodies the will of you, the People. We now have peace, but remain ever vigilant against our treacherous foes. Even now our brave State Security Commission is rooting out the disaffected traitors and troublemakers who would disturb the Peace of our Worker's Paradise!
Already we see that our enemy has not changed his nature, despite having been forced to the negotiating table, by our glorious feats of arms under the inspired leadership of Marshal Locutov and the heroism of General Orilliosk and the other officers. Again the false accusations spew forth, coupled with the unceasing propaganda aimed at corrupting our Socialist vision and inciting the People towards decadence.
Witness one of our Tawakalnian women respond the blatant degeneracy and licentiousness of Mustantopia..
Remember the purity of our cause! Denounce the traitors amongst you! be on your guard against Mustantopian and Factorovian agents! Defend the Revolution! protect the munificence of Comrade Taw and the Morrison's fresh grocery section! Remember that thanks to Tawakalna, when you buy a half a cucumber you only pay for half a cucumber!
As I am unable to attend the Armistice talks in person, for my duty is to remain in the Motherland as an inspiration to our People, the loyal Comrade Indinsky will once again shoulder the burden, along with the Generals of the Armies who will ensure security and co-operation for the occasion...
(Esquilaxiov, are those long-range stealth missiles ready yet? i trust they will carry the new organic warheads of Fartov @ssripper V? just a precaution. range the missiles onto, oh, say, the Ashford area - no particular reason
)
Edited by - Tawakalna on 1/1/2004 10:21:22 AM