I"m now much of a writer really. My mind usually goes blank unless i'm pissed off. What you have seems to be pretty good. IMO, I think you should focus on the character's feelings. But that's just me. I'm sure some others will be along to give you ideas. I've been reading the webstory stuff, and there are lots of creative people on here.

My advice is that you go real drunk - you don't imagine what your mind may do when you're not in control (just don't forget to write it down). Besides, the stream of consciousness thingy is popular among many folks. Anyway, what you've done so far is cool (didn't count the words though - but who cares?). Maybe just relax and enjoy your accomplishment?

zlo has made a good point. Just get drunk and write. You'd be amazed at how creative Ambien can make a girl (or guy so as not to offend..lol)

from what i've read i would focus more on this light thing but don't focus on it for too long otherwise the reader will get bored

"Make it so Number One"
Captain Picard 'Star Trek the Next Generation'

I'd say what you have is good, considering that conveying fear through print is extremely difficult.

it might be a good idea to focus less on the light and more on the effects of the light:
say that the dog may be going frantic by the sudden darkness, and maybe a few more dogs down the street were set off but as the light appeared, the animals all went quiet.

Maybe a lightbulb could go in the house, but the power is still off.

Talk about feelings and effects, the best atmosphere is created when you describe things you can imagine but in incorrect context, something that would unnerve you.

have him look out into the backyard and hear something swinging and for a split second have the light illuminate the yard and have (insert something crazy).

WIND, wind is good, especially if things are blowing, making noise and doing crazy **** but then when you go there theres no wind at all.

-arcon
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thank you all.. i'll think about the wind bit.. oh and stick the light in the house.. thanks alot~ everyone.. but i find it kinda hard to get hold of alcahol here.. i'll just grab yeast and make some pure ones..

Nothing like some alchohol to get your mind running, eh? Good luck, kimk.

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you dont need beer, you need a MUSE.
get some wench to help stimulate the mind. That, or watch some quality horror films

-arcon
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@zlo: Hehe, sounds like something I would've said... And done...
@Arcon: Quality horror movies? What's that? I mean there are a few good enough films, but they rarely have an 'inspirational atmosphere'...


Careful what you wish... You might just get it.

blair witch has the best atmosphere ever. shoestring budget making you utterly crapping yourself from sounds and weather. In fact the only thing the guys were in on was the final scene. Paranoia and imagination are the best tools baby!

-arcon
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goto this page it would help with the homework but its probably
too late but check it out anyway

http://home.comcast.net/~n9ivo/whatswrong.swf

OK IceFire 1.2
You are not too long around here but it is an unwritten rule on these forums
(other forums as well probably)

Do not resurrect threads

For the other rulings here, Be so Kind to read the forum FAQ (It's top off the page, Amongst the other links).

Thank You

And to think I nearly posted advice, not realizing it was an old thread. Kimk, how did you do for a result on your homework?

But as for some of you who like to "stimulate" your brain with mind altering substances. I completely disagree with that. I have now written over my lifetime some pretty odd and weird things (just look to my plays). I never used anything to get to that state to come up with those. Because I never wanted to lose the ability to write what is beautiful and inspirational, which are my favourite stories.

In my opinion, and my opinion alone, people who use substances to make thoughts are themselves not very thoughtful and need to account for that.

I don't want to insult any of you. I am just merely trying to help you "think" another way.

----------------------------------------------------
My Humorous & True Lancers Reactor Plays; with REAL posters as characters in these divine comedies, hosted right here on TLR:

"Much Uba About Nothing"
* "This might be the funniest thread EVER seen on these forums. Encore!" - Stinger
"The Taming of the Psycho" (Hey)
* "Bravo! Bravo! Wow your writing is impressive!" - mb52
"Zlothello"
* "If I video'd my face while reading this, it would've been a comedy in itself." - Imagine


Sir Spectre

Who was the penguin in trousers with whom she was to have sinned?
-- From the play "Zlothello"

Edited by - Sir Spectre on 11-10-2003 21:41:56