Mon Sep 20, 2004 7:35 am
Honeymoons and Hurricanes
*slips in through secret entrance and marks doorway with ultra-violet pen for later use* At last! I found the escape hatch from this place!!! woohoo! 
ello peeps, how are we all? Its been 3 weeks since I last ranted at you all, did you miss me?!
My wedding went well, very well in fact. After 3 months of rain, the clouds parted for 24 hours and the sun shone gloriously over the kentish wetlands. Just enough time for my 150 guests to party like there was no tomorrow, fall asleep in gutters and jump into hotel rooms with each other. What a day it was. The champagne and vodka flowed, the food was delicious and the band rocked the night away. Even my speech went down well - which was suprising as it was partly in Polish, so I had no idea if I was saying nice things or fluently swearing at them all. Twas great...a good time was had by all (I think!).
Then off to Vegas we flew...15 friends in tow...were we partied for 3 days and 3 nights. Which reminds me, I would have hoped that at least one of our US brethren might have warned me that it was "Labour Day Weekend" - the busiest bloody holiday in Vegas! Tut! Twas great though, the place was just a mindblowingly enormous den of sin and abandon. I've never seen anything like it. On the second day we were re-married by Elvis (aka Norman Jones) in a little chapel opposite a bailbond company ("Jailbusters" and next to a strip club. Hilarious, truly hilarious.
Then we ditched the friends and flew on to San Fransisco, were we absorbed a little culture and did plenty of sightseeing. I love that city. It was genuinely cool. I didn't leave my new wife in Alcatraz as was previously suggested, but you may speculate it was because she was holding the rest of the flight tickets
Then after 3 days of museums, hills and bridges we flew to Houston, which is now officially Gromit's hell hole of the universe. What a dump. 40 square miles of post-apocolyptic landscape. Oil refineries as far as the eye can see. Strange how they miss that one out of the NASA Tourist guide
Luckily we only stayed there for 12 hours before we jumped onto a cruise liner to take us south into the Gulf of Mexico.
Day 1: At Sea, beautiful blue sky, calm sea, calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 38 degrees. Loved it.
Day 2: At Sea, beautiful blue sky, slightly bumpy sea, calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 37 degrees. Loved it again.
Night 2: At Sea, Hurrican Ivan, 45 feet waves, ship rocking so violently people were hurling in corridors and almost standing vertically on the walls, kids crying, old people having heart attacks, beds flying, lots of praying, lots of life jacket hugging. Hated it. Worst night of my life, period.
Day 3: At Sea, should have been at Cozumel but island was on full scale hurricane warning... Captain had sailed as far south as possible during night to avoid sinking. Rocky, cloudy, rainy, miserable. Calypso band on top deck, large whiskey and ginger in hand. 38 degrees. Coped with it.
Day 4: Roatan. Beautiful island. Swam with dolphins in turquoise water, off a white sandy beach. Drank and ate ourselves silly with a local taxi driver in small beach hut. Explored poverty stricken island, returned to boat feeling guilty but enriched by the island's beauty. Blue Sky, Calm Sea, Calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 40 degrees. One of the best days of my life.
Day 5: Belize. Trekked through jungle with 3 foot diameter black inner tube for approximately an hour. Leaped of 14 foot high cliff into turqoise lagoon. Sat on inner tube and floated down river for 2 hours at approx. 1mph through underground caves, lagoons and rapids with torch on my head. An experience never to be forgotten. Returned to ship. Blue Sky, Calm Sea, Calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 45 degrees. 2nd best day of my life.
Day 6: Due to dock in Cancun but port was destroyed by Ivan. Docked in Cozumel instead. Immediately ignored island and took small boat to Mexico. Jumped on bus to Mayan Ruins. Explored and photographed. Returned to Cozumel and barely made it in time before ship was due to leave. Blue Sky, Calm Sea, Calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 45 degrees. Loved it.
Day 7: At sea. Blue Sky, Calm Sea, Calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 45 degrees. Chilled, relaxed and loved it.
Damn that Calypso band were hard working!!
So there it is, my honeymoon in a snapshot. Did I miss anything around here? (Can't be bothered to dreg the 3 weeks of forum posts!)
EDIT : my blog is slowly filling up with a few piccies and more detailed descriptions of what actually went on, if anyone can be arsed to read it. I went into detail with Vegas for the benefit of the friends who were with me out there - but the San Fransisco and Cruise blogs will be shorter - I think!
Edited by - gromit on 9/22/2004 10:13:45 AM
ello peeps, how are we all? Its been 3 weeks since I last ranted at you all, did you miss me?!
My wedding went well, very well in fact. After 3 months of rain, the clouds parted for 24 hours and the sun shone gloriously over the kentish wetlands. Just enough time for my 150 guests to party like there was no tomorrow, fall asleep in gutters and jump into hotel rooms with each other. What a day it was. The champagne and vodka flowed, the food was delicious and the band rocked the night away. Even my speech went down well - which was suprising as it was partly in Polish, so I had no idea if I was saying nice things or fluently swearing at them all. Twas great...a good time was had by all (I think!).
Then off to Vegas we flew...15 friends in tow...were we partied for 3 days and 3 nights. Which reminds me, I would have hoped that at least one of our US brethren might have warned me that it was "Labour Day Weekend" - the busiest bloody holiday in Vegas! Tut! Twas great though, the place was just a mindblowingly enormous den of sin and abandon. I've never seen anything like it. On the second day we were re-married by Elvis (aka Norman Jones) in a little chapel opposite a bailbond company ("Jailbusters"
and next to a strip club. Hilarious, truly hilarious.
Then we ditched the friends and flew on to San Fransisco, were we absorbed a little culture and did plenty of sightseeing. I love that city. It was genuinely cool. I didn't leave my new wife in Alcatraz as was previously suggested, but you may speculate it was because she was holding the rest of the flight tickets
Then after 3 days of museums, hills and bridges we flew to Houston, which is now officially Gromit's hell hole of the universe. What a dump. 40 square miles of post-apocolyptic landscape. Oil refineries as far as the eye can see. Strange how they miss that one out of the NASA Tourist guide
Luckily we only stayed there for 12 hours before we jumped onto a cruise liner to take us south into the Gulf of Mexico.
Day 1: At Sea, beautiful blue sky, calm sea, calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 38 degrees. Loved it.
Day 2: At Sea, beautiful blue sky, slightly bumpy sea, calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 37 degrees. Loved it again.
Night 2: At Sea, Hurrican Ivan, 45 feet waves, ship rocking so violently people were hurling in corridors and almost standing vertically on the walls, kids crying, old people having heart attacks, beds flying, lots of praying, lots of life jacket hugging. Hated it. Worst night of my life, period.
Day 3: At Sea, should have been at Cozumel but island was on full scale hurricane warning... Captain had sailed as far south as possible during night to avoid sinking. Rocky, cloudy, rainy, miserable. Calypso band on top deck, large whiskey and ginger in hand. 38 degrees. Coped with it.
Day 4: Roatan. Beautiful island. Swam with dolphins in turquoise water, off a white sandy beach. Drank and ate ourselves silly with a local taxi driver in small beach hut. Explored poverty stricken island, returned to boat feeling guilty but enriched by the island's beauty. Blue Sky, Calm Sea, Calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 40 degrees. One of the best days of my life.
Day 5: Belize. Trekked through jungle with 3 foot diameter black inner tube for approximately an hour. Leaped of 14 foot high cliff into turqoise lagoon. Sat on inner tube and floated down river for 2 hours at approx. 1mph through underground caves, lagoons and rapids with torch on my head. An experience never to be forgotten. Returned to ship. Blue Sky, Calm Sea, Calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 45 degrees. 2nd best day of my life.
Day 6: Due to dock in Cancun but port was destroyed by Ivan. Docked in Cozumel instead. Immediately ignored island and took small boat to Mexico. Jumped on bus to Mayan Ruins. Explored and photographed. Returned to Cozumel and barely made it in time before ship was due to leave. Blue Sky, Calm Sea, Calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 45 degrees. Loved it.
Day 7: At sea. Blue Sky, Calm Sea, Calypso band on top deck, poncey cocktail in hand. 45 degrees. Chilled, relaxed and loved it.
Damn that Calypso band were hard working!!
So there it is, my honeymoon in a snapshot. Did I miss anything around here? (Can't be bothered to dreg the 3 weeks of forum posts!)
EDIT : my blog is slowly filling up with a few piccies and more detailed descriptions of what actually went on, if anyone can be arsed to read it. I went into detail with Vegas for the benefit of the friends who were with me out there - but the San Fransisco and Cruise blogs will be shorter - I think!
Edited by - gromit on 9/22/2004 10:13:45 AM
