Important Message

You are browsing the archived Lancers Reactor forums. You cannot register or login.
The content may be outdated and links may not be functional.


To get the latest in Freelancer news, mods, modding and downloads, go to
The-Starport

The small town

This is where you can discuss your homework, family, just about anything, make strange sounds and otherwise discuss things which are really not related to the Lancer-series. Yes that means you can discuss other games.

Post Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:20 am

The small town

Something I've been working on, totally different from FS in this I'm trying to actually use correct and good grammar, comments and corrections will be appreciated. At this stage it won't make much sense, but hopefully later it will


All good comes from MOTHERearth. All evil comes from MANkind
Forum Systems A must read

Post Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:22 am

Life was quiet until she came to town. It was a small town, no more than 200 inhabitants. The buildings were mostly old and wore down. Here and there an almost new building rose. Everything was painted either grey or brown. Curtains were white, brown or black. The biggest building in the town was the abandoned castle of a millionaire. It stood on a secluded rising, looking cold and forbidding.

The morning the girl arrived in the town, suited the appearance of the town. Everything was covered in a curtain of grey. Menacing clouds were lying low, ready to pour out thousands of litres of rain. She drove into the town just as the floodgates of heaven opened. Within minutes of her arrival, the town was buzzing with speculation and rumours. The main topic of discussion being her car. It was a beetle; the beetle in its car-being was not spectacular. It was the colour that got everybody talking.

It was painted bright orange with the word “Bulldog”, in red, on the nose. Such a thing was unheard of in the town. Cars were black, white or grey. She drove to the only service station in town. There she spoke her first words. She had a cultivated voice, soothing to the ears.
“Please check the oil and the water, the gas is fine”
The man working at the station was surprised; he wasn’t used to hear people saying please. He looked her over, so this was The Teacher.

It was the first time in the history of the town that they would have a teacher. Usually children were taught to read and write by their parents. At first glance the man could see that she would not fit in. You could actually tell that by only seeing her car. Her appearance was just as…as different as her car. Unlike all the women in the town, her hair was short. Her dress didn’t reach her feet, but instead only her knees.

Finished at the service station, she proceeded to drive to the mayor’s house. She parked the car and went to the door. The servant opened the door and was slightly taken aback by her appearance. The Teacher politely introduced herself and asked if she could see the mayor. You could hear that she was a very educated woman, her grammar and pronunciation was perfect.

The servant, who was greatly impressed by this phenomenon, stammered that the mayor was busy conducting business and would speak to her as soon as he could.
She offered The Teacher some tea and invited her to sit down. About ten minutes later she entered the room again, “You can go through, the Mayor is finished.”
The teacher’s eyes went wide and she paled “What? Have you phoned an ambulance? Have you phoned the police?”
The servant was flabbergasted “Why would I want to phone the police or an ambulance?”
“There could be a chance that we can save him, quickly phone!”
The servant didn’t understand what was going on, there had to be something wrong with The Teacher. She decided that it would be a good idea to call the mayor, he could sort this out.

Two minutes later the mayor stormed into the room. The Teacher who didn’t know him, immediately asked: “Are you the doctor?”

Post Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:27 am

wow good start sw btw, its worn down.

Edited by - freighter fighter on 6/20/2004 10:24:12 AM

Post Sun Jun 20, 2004 11:25 am

If we're going for completely correct English, with each new paragraph, and when a new speaker starts speaking, in addition to the new line there should be an indent. But I appreciate that you can't use the tab key on this forum and the spacebar would get tedious.

Post Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:21 pm

hmm interesting, never seen it or heard bout it

Return to Off Topic