Thu Aug 07, 2003 12:40 pm
Misguided attempts to connect SW Ep III to the OT
The Force.net has a hilarious thread going on about connecting Star Wars Episode III to the Original Trilogy.
<pre><font size=1 face=Courier>Source: theforce.net </font></pre>
Topic: Misguided attempts to connect to the OT (humor)
It is very important for Episode III to provide a smooth transition from the PT to the OT. The visuals, the cinematography, the design... everything has to flow correctly.
But there are some things from the OT I just don't think we need to link back to.
• While Anakin gets cybernetic implants to become Vader, Yoda is digitally blasted apart and put back together with rubber to become a Muppet
• Clonetroopers convert to cheaper stormtrooper technology; Anakin turns to the dark side out of frustration of being made to shave the fins off 1,200,000 clonetrooper helmets
• Chewbacca given a midi-chlorian test, just for the hell of it
• As speculated by many, Obi-Wan takes his name from Ben Quardinaros the Podracer; their meeting takes a mere half-hour of plot time to arrange and is an utter delight to all six fans of Quardinaros
(Private Ackbar undergoes a Trap Classification and Detection training session)
• Fellow Private Tarkin cuts class that day, misses Danger Assessment Test. Instead, smokes cigarettes under the bleachers at Corsucant Stadium with cadet Needa.
• Yoda graduates from the Coruscant Culinary Institute with honors. Final Thesis: Making Tasty Stew With Ingredients From A Slimy Mudhole. "Crank it up a notch, you must."
• Anakin/Vader's wardrobe session with Coruscant clothier: "Sea Green? Too trendy. Mauve? Taupe? Tan? Too sandy. Ah hell, just make it black!"
• Obi wan will arrive with Luke to Tatooine. Once there he will realize his mistake:
"Oh sshi.. the girl, I left the girl!!!!.
• Jar jar: I´m your father
Chewie: Nooooooooooooo
• In order to resonate deeply with ROTJ, Palpatine will give Vader his new helmet and say, "See, it's a hat."
• Greedo will get into a speeder accident and will break his arm in the process, causing several seizures in his arm to occur whenever he holds a blaster. So that will explain why Greedo shoots first..and misaims really badly.
• Tarkin's 1 hour liposuction surgery scene deleted due to his ongoing malpractice suit. "I said take me down to 175 pounds, NOT 125!!! I look like freakin' Skeletor!"
See the thread in their Episode III forum: Misguided attempts to connect to the OT (humor)
Hope is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of our greatest strength and our greatest weakness.
<pre><font size=1 face=Courier>Source: theforce.net </font></pre>
Topic: Misguided attempts to connect to the OT (humor)
It is very important for Episode III to provide a smooth transition from the PT to the OT. The visuals, the cinematography, the design... everything has to flow correctly.
But there are some things from the OT I just don't think we need to link back to.
• While Anakin gets cybernetic implants to become Vader, Yoda is digitally blasted apart and put back together with rubber to become a Muppet
• Clonetroopers convert to cheaper stormtrooper technology; Anakin turns to the dark side out of frustration of being made to shave the fins off 1,200,000 clonetrooper helmets
• Chewbacca given a midi-chlorian test, just for the hell of it
• As speculated by many, Obi-Wan takes his name from Ben Quardinaros the Podracer; their meeting takes a mere half-hour of plot time to arrange and is an utter delight to all six fans of Quardinaros
(Private Ackbar undergoes a Trap Classification and Detection training session)
• Fellow Private Tarkin cuts class that day, misses Danger Assessment Test. Instead, smokes cigarettes under the bleachers at Corsucant Stadium with cadet Needa.
• Yoda graduates from the Coruscant Culinary Institute with honors. Final Thesis: Making Tasty Stew With Ingredients From A Slimy Mudhole. "Crank it up a notch, you must."
• Anakin/Vader's wardrobe session with Coruscant clothier: "Sea Green? Too trendy. Mauve? Taupe? Tan? Too sandy. Ah hell, just make it black!"
• Obi wan will arrive with Luke to Tatooine. Once there he will realize his mistake:
"Oh sshi.. the girl, I left the girl!!!!.
• Jar jar: I´m your father
Chewie: Nooooooooooooo
• In order to resonate deeply with ROTJ, Palpatine will give Vader his new helmet and say, "See, it's a hat."
• Greedo will get into a speeder accident and will break his arm in the process, causing several seizures in his arm to occur whenever he holds a blaster. So that will explain why Greedo shoots first..and misaims really badly.
• Tarkin's 1 hour liposuction surgery scene deleted due to his ongoing malpractice suit. "I said take me down to 175 pounds, NOT 125!!! I look like freakin' Skeletor!"
See the thread in their Episode III forum: Misguided attempts to connect to the OT (humor)
Hope is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of our greatest strength and our greatest weakness.
